The Bottomless Pit of Paperwork is My Mountaintop!

I love doing the paperwork, and I hate doing the paperwork.  There is always the elation that comes from opening the mail box and taking out that thick envelope that barely fits in the box.  The envelope is always a bit shredded on the edges from being smashed in there, and is folded lengthwise so all the papers inside have that permanent bend.  I look at the return address, delighted to see that the adoption agency or homestudy agency has sent me the packet I was waiting for!  I can hardly wait to get in the house, open it up, and see how I can get started on productively moving forward to bring home our next child.

And then, once in the house, I open the package, quickly glance through the sweet and friendly salutations, and go straight to the heart of the matter.  Inevitably, my heart sinks as I once again face the reality that is an adoption.  It's never easy.  Not even kind of easy.  In fact, it's pretty much downright discouraging.  How much more of a reminder do I need that my own body's failure to reproduce naturally has resulted in the necessity for us to completely and candidly expose ourselves to complete strangers and bureaucratic agencies for examintion and evaluation?   Appointments for fingerprinting in three different places, including one place that is more than a three-hour drive; seven pages of "autobiography" questions delving into stuff I really don't care to share about myself; fourteen background clearances for all the states Jay and I have lived since we were 18 (that doesn't include the places we've lived out of the country--sad to say, those places don't even track child abuse, so there's no way to get clearances from them!  How many children are abused in those places and no one is held accountable?!)  And of course, we cannot forget I need to make appointments for someone to check my septic tank and my well.  And provide the cats' shot records. And make medical check-ups for every member of our family.  The list goes on and on.  It's a wonder any of us do this more than once!  It's nerve-wracking, annoying, difficult, costly, embarassing, time-consuming, and a host of other things.

But the same can be said for a physical pregnancy and birth, I think.  How many friends do I know who have had unpleasant pregnancies, or very difficult births, yet they often choose to do it a second and third time?  It's all just part and parcel of the way God brings children into families.  And if we're trusting him with our lives, then we trust him with our pregnancies, be they the workings of biology or bureaucracy.   And of course, as almost any mom will tell you, it's all worth it in the end.

So here we are, in the thick of it.  I take a moment to get beyone the initial realization that this is not just another bottomless pit of paperwork; it is a mountain we must climb to the top. And so I press on.  As a child of God, I can look at this in one of two ways: 

First, I know that God placed the mountains in our way for His own glory and purpose, and He will be the one to remove them.  After all, He is God!

 Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.  Psalm 90:2

  The mountains melt like wax before the Lord, before the Lord of all the earth. Psalm 97:5

 I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron.  Isaiah 45:2

And secondly, the mountains are a means of God bringing blessings and good news to his people:

How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, "Your God reigns!"  Isaiah 52:7


I want to keep my perspective regarding the mountains we face as we come to them.  We've been on three adoption journeys, all very different, and they've all taken us over mountains.  Some of those mountains we are still climbing.  But I can honestly say every climb has left us breathless and inspired with the awe of what we've seen on that mountaintop.   We have seen God's very hand at work.  We have seen our faith grow.  We have felt His very presence in times of fear and despair.  We have seen some of what He sees when we looked at his own child, given to us for a time, as she wavered between life and death, knowing that He placed her in our care for this very purpose.  The view from the mountain is very different from the view from a safe position closer to sea level.  The perspective it completely different, and to really get an idea of the Big Picture, it helps to see it from a higher altitude.  I'll take the mountaintop view anyday no matter how hard the climb. (I can tell you right now, I'm going to have to remind myself of this statement when we are faced with a referral in the future.)

As I told my Sunday School class this morning, either we believe God is in control, or we don't.  There's really no other way about it.  He created the mountains, and He alone can remove them or help us scale them as He wills.

And we haven't even gotten the packet from the adoption agency yet!  I'm only working on the homestudy paperwork now.